what goes up and down , and left and right all day without breaking a sweat? A compass, get your mind out of the gudder.

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whats Mario's favorite kind of jeans? Denim, denim, denim.

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What happened in your mom's locked bedroom last night I don't know

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yo mommas so ugly that everyone died.

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O: How do you kill a black man? A: Shoot him

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So a Quadriplegic walks into a bar.....

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why did the beachball get sad after it was deflated? Beachballs don't have emotions.

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why dont we just take bikini bottom and push it somewhere else

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Q: What do janitors and nuns have in common? A: They can't fly.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing duplicates of the top jokes.

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Roses are Purple Chickens are gray I'm color blind You have cancer I'll see you in hell Ba bye now

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i ate and i ate and i was sick on the floor 8x8=64

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What is brown and sticky. Hot chocolate.

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. The muffins do not talk or move, because they not living.

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What happens when a rabbit is late for a very important date? Nothing, rabbits have no logical way to keep track of time.

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THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE!

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a fat old hobo named da'shovant'e ate a bucket of fried chicken then killed a little girl named poopface McFergusen

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What do you get when you cross an intersection? Possibly a lower leg contussion, ACL tear, breaks in 4 different sections of your arm and lots of brain swelling if you are hit by a car.

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Knock knock Who's there? Batman Batman who? Because he was

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Why did the Spice Girls stop performing? They mutually agreed to stop performing.

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Roses are red, violets are blue God made me beautiful, how about you?

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Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

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girl: why do you love me? boy: i don't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops