Sticks and stones can break my bones And words can make me lonely

John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

A man walks into a bar, sits down and the bartender comes over and asks him what he wants to drink. The man replies, "Carrot Juice."

Why was the Mexican socially inept. Because he hadn't recieved a good education

ginger

sometimes i wonder why is the frisbee getting bigger? then it hits me

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

You know what they called Obama in highschool? Nigge*

oooh look a banshee

Why did Amy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Amy

Your mother is so black...because she recently suffered a horrible accident with fire and has irreparable skin damage.

What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick, and could not speak during the last few weeks of his life.

How do you starve a blonde? You tie them up and deprive them of any food.

why was the boy running? because his skin was burning off

Q: Why is six afraid of seven? A: Why??? Q: Idk, thats why I asked

A man walks into a bar. He is then rushed to the emergency room for severe blunt force trauma to the head and multiple cranial fractures. After years of mental therapy the man re-gains full cerebral capabilities and is extremely cautious to keep an eye out for potentially dangerous bars that present a threat to his fragile reconstructed skull.

Why did the blonde fail her driving test? She was paralyzed and had down syndrome.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

What do you call this? A sentence in English.

What is James Miller's real name? James Miller.

What's worst than the Holocaust? No Wi-Fi

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmicist.

What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat

What starts with P and ends with orn? Porn

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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