if i had a nickel for every time iv typed an anti joke... i would have $0.15

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what do you call a newborn baby? anything you want.

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Do you know what my favorite rhetorical question is?

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Why didnt Santa give the little Girl her Pony? Santas not real.

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Q: What's bigger than a volcano? A: Earth

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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What did pikachu say when his trainer was murdered? Pikachu.

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The answer: He is dead! (read it throughout so you cant go wrong) Question: So why cant a man in Italia marry his widows sister? Moral: Had yet to read one like this one...

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Why did the baboon fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A mormon *slam*

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Why was Newton surprised when the apple fell on his head? Because he was sitting under a pear tree.

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Were did Suzie go after the bombing? A: everywere

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What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

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i'm funny

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A Mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The black guy because the Mexicans was recently aressted for a dwi and had his repealed. But lately he has worked towards cleaning his life up. They were actually driving to an AA meeting.

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ecks! why zee?

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Q: What did the student say to the teacher? A: The answer is four.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family of four.

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a 5 year old rapes a pedophile

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You're not that bad...you're still better at giving hand jobs than your dad is."

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Chinese drivers.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? The bench can support a family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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