What do you call a black guy who kills people? A murderer.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Where was Andy Beckett WHEN THE LIGHTS WENT OUT? In the dark

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A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pilot.

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Your mom is so fat, that it causes great concern for her family.

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So I was eating pancakes in my driveway...or were they waffles?

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground beef

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Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

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A Jew walks into a bar The bar owner looks at a gang of punks in the back and shouts "YOU! GET OUT!" The Jew leaves the bar.

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A women president

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A man walks into a car. And drive's off.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

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Why was the little girl blowing bubbles in the swimming pool? Because she was drowning

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A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What's brown and green and if it falls out of a tree on top of you, it will kill you? A pool table

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Whats worse than malaria? Dying from it.

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roses are red. violets are violet...

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What do you get when you mix Catholicism and Islam? War

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Why did the chicken eat fried chicken? Because fried chicken is so good! Kelvin Yang.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar. somebody recognizes him and immidiately asks for his autograph

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What did the Man say to the elephant Nothing this man does not speak, the elephant does though

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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