Roses are red, That much is true, but Violet are purple, not ****ing blue

Where do you go when you die? Nowhere

jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water jack collapsed because of serious drug abuse and stress jill followed after not being able to handle the tragedy of her brothers death this wouldn't have happened if they got into my van when i asked them too.

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme but this one doesn't

Why did the man name his boy "Sue?" He had bad eyesight and thought it was a girl.

Q:What's worse than stepping on lego? A:Hiroshima.

roses are red violets are blue im colorblind how about you

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

why did the kid let go of his kite? He got struck by lightning

(approach girl) How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to fit into the same dress as you

why did the kid get in trouble. Because he put this up in typing class -charles hall aka chuckles

a girl and a guy rented a hotel room for a night. theyre siblings and stayed up all night watching very classy movies about farm animals and each of them ordered a chocolate cake to eat while watching their fantastic informational film.

Whyd the girl fall of her bike? She rode over a curb

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

its was amazinglysmooth fuck off

Why did the house get trashed? Cause the babysitter was a rooster

whats worse than school...wait a minute?

What do you do with a pickle jar full of semen? Use it for gel, because it took so long to collect it all, and you're frugal person who believes in recycling.

say yes will u remember me in a year?yes will u remember me in a month? yes will u remember me in a week?yes will u remember me in a minute?yes will u remember me in a second?yes knock knock whos there u said u will remember me u dick

What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Well you can't drive planes

Why cant a black man and a white man cant be friends? Because bont mens are racist

what do you get when you cross a rhino and a chicken? well, if you're unlucky and too close too the chicken, salmonella if you provoke the rhino, impaled

Is that a baby in your carriage or are you just happ..... WTF. WHERES ITS EYES!? **purges**

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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