Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of it coop and there was something shinny on the other side of the street.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

your mum

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's 9+10? 19

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the cat explode on the street? Cause i put a grenade in a fridge and then threw it at it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

So a Jewish, Hispanic, and Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "aren't you tired of this?"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Guess What! HI!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They beat her.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A Man walks in to a bar and orders a pint of lager, he notices something floating on the top of his drink so he calls over the bartender. "Excuse me, I think there's something in my dr-" The man's sentence was cut short as a man with a gun had just walked into the bar. He killed everyone, there were no survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

If E = cos[(6x+8) + 5x!] + tan(90-X)^2, and x = 137/43, what is E? The fifth letter of the alphabet.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What rhymes with bigger and can jump really high? Tigger

thumb_up thumb_down -10

a horse walks into a bar. what does the bartender say? why is there a horse in my bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what's the worst thing ever? reality TV shows and singing contest shows

thumb_up thumb_down -10

And so i say to the preist ........... pass the bananas

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red Violets are blue i got one question Screw You

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what do you call a man with three eyes and eleven fingers? his name

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear made her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What happened to the starving african kid? He died

thumb_up thumb_down -12

No.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Jews

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did Sally eat popcorn? She was watching a movie

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Police Report: A 100 year old man was beaten to death on his centennial birthday. Sources claim to say he was "getting his birthday punches"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops