A Muslim boards a plane and he sits done quietly and politely just like everyone else, the plan lands safely at its destination.

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What did the man with Tourette's say to the other man? Surely something he did not mean to say.

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Which is correct grammar: 'I hasn't a penis got' or 'I doesn't a penis has'? Answer: They're both wrong.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead.

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Why is lewis rank gay Coz he is

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Yo mamma so mexican she brought tacos to the dinner table

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Why did the clown fall off the swing? Because he was dead.

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What is the meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything in it? I'm not sure at rhe moment, but it will take aproximately seven and a half million years of thinking for me to find out.

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? To get to the body shop.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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Whats your name? Bill. I have a son named Kevin.

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That Awkward moment when your whole family dies

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What time is it? 10:58

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You heard about that piece of shit that says no all the time? Yes, I bet you haven't though. no.

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I thought I was a bird and I could fly Gravity painfully reminded me I was only a human

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What did Abraham Lincoln say to his slaves? Nothing, Abraham Lincoln had no slaves.

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so a horse walks into a bar right, and he goes up to the bartender, and the bartender being a smartass says why the long face(get because hes a horse), and the horse says his wife is dying of lung cancer, child services are taking his kids away , and im addicted to crack and that is why i have a long face the bartender then gives him the next round for free and the the horse dies of alchohol poisoning

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A man walks into a hospital with a panicked expression, and rushes to his doctor's office. "Doctor, I am in tremendous pain when I breath!" "Hmm, seems to be a lung problem, take one of these antibiotics twice a day." "Thank you so much!" "Oh yah! Your family was brutally killed in a sixteen car pile up."

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What did the black guy do to the hooker, he took her dead body out of his trunk

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A black man says "ask" correctly.

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what happened after 9/11?? 9/12.

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knock knock. who's there? someone.

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roses are scarce, violets are farse, come over here and i'll stick it up ya ar#e.

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Whats worse then finding TWO worms in your apple? The Holocaust, it was pretty bad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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