Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

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What did the priest say to the kid? You can tell your dog but nobody else, ok?

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Why did everyone call the one-legged man Matt? Because that was his name.

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A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

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How do you know if a girl is special? If she hates justin bieber, Twilight, and is open to threeways.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard -you throw them.

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What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

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Ask me if I'm a tree... Are you a tree? No.

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nina...;shut up we are having fun :)

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What is worse then North Korea trying to blow up everybody? Peter Griffin twerking.

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Your mama's so poor, that it's hard for her to pay her bills.

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Nippies

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What's the worst part about being drunk? Your child.

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What did the little boy order at Burger King? He ordered a burger and wiped his booger on the counter.

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I dont know, are you a tomato?

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

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Johnny woke up christmas morning, went downstairs and opened his presents to find he had an iPhone, iPad,Ps3 Laptop, the full lot. Then his mate came around and Johnny bragged about all the stuff he had got. Then his mate replied," I wish i had cancer".

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There once was a man from Kentucky...then he raped everyone in sight... THE END

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What word is ten letters long and starts with gas? Gastronomy.

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After a long romantic date with my girl friend I went home. Upon walking to my bathroom for a dootie i realize that I'm gay. So I break up with my girl friend and I am now in a wonderful relationship with Jose, He sell's sea shells at discount prices.

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Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

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Yo mama is... a very nice person, and her cooking is exquisite.

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whats softer than a furry blanket an indian

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my shift key is broken1

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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