What's funnier than 24? 25

Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

a man walks into a bar and says "help me, my daughter just got hit by a car! the bartender phones the ambulance and the girl survives.

Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

Badgers are cool

Shit!

What did the stuffed animal say to the human after the human said hi? Nothing, after all stuffed animals can't talk

Why couldn't the blonde bride make it to her own wedding? She had another unplanned circumstance occur and the wedding was postponed until next week.

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

What do you call a really old Cowboy? A senior citizen with a brain tumor.

What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting raped mercilessly by Ronald McDonald.

The Cubs are going to win the world series this year

One day a black man, a white man, and an Asian man decide to bet on who has the longest penis. The white man wins by 1/18th of an inch, effectively disproving the stereotype. They all go home a little gayer for the experience.

What is brown and sticky. Hot chocolate.

how much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood three wood

My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son of a B**ch.

The doctor asks the patient how he's doing, the patient says fine. The doctor says "that's weird cause you have leukemia."

What's red and smells like green paint? The rotting corpse of the old lady I poisoned with green paint.

"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

Penal Dysfunction

A Brunette a ginger and a blonde were getting their hair done? WHich side of the bus did they sit on? Why did i put a question mark on the first part?

how do you kill a blonde? hit her in the back repeatedly with a crowbar

How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

AIDS

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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