A man walked into a bar. It hurt.

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Whats worse than 1 dead baby in a bag? Ten dead babies in one bag.

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A man was driving five penguins across the Croatian-Serbian border. He was a penguin smuggler.

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How many Jew can you fit in a car? As many as the car seats comfortably.

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Q:why did the boy fall off the swing A:he had no arms Q:why couldn't he get up A:he had no legs Q:why did he die A:he fell in a puddle

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What has 9 arms and sucks? Def Leppard

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Roses are red violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo don't be sad cause I'll be there to not in the cage but laughing at you

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Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man, a white man has lighter skin

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How many chicken feathers are there in a 50 pound bag? 50 pounds worth Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a duck Why did the man cross the road? It was duck season A woman is dying but can't reach her husband. Why? A duck ate his cell-phone A pig walks into a bar but there is no bartender. Where is she? Dead A duck hunter is selling a duck to a man. The man only pays the duck hunter a quarter. Why? It was full of chicken feathers.

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Whats worse than getting stabbed in nuts? A retarded baby that survived the abortion

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was John Elway.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father, prepare to die.

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What do you call a group of angry unemployed black guys? The NBA

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What's the difference between Cindy Crawford and a Snickers bar? Nothing. One is a mediocre actress, the other is a peanut based bar of chocolate confectionary.

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what happened after 9/11?? 9/12.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nematode's. A Nematode is a type of round worm that lives under water, and while most are carnivorous, some feed on vegetation, such as pineapples.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

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how did hitler fit 100 Jews in his car??? he couldn't, his car only fits 5 people.

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drugs sex alcohol are as funny as AIDS

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Joseph. Joseph who? Joseph Brown. Oh, hello Joseph! Why don't you come in? No thank you.

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guess what? What? you have to guess...your mama

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How do you know it's a Mexican's birthday? They bring cupcakes to school for your entire class to enjoy.

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Q.What did the muffin say when the other muffin said, "How ya doin'?" A."HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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