What stinks and comes out of someones mouth. Bad Breath

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Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

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Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

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a ghost walks into a bar and sais BOO! The bartender then yelded AAAAHHH! and died of a hart attack.

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What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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Why was the fish disappointed with his grades? They were all below C-level!

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What do you call a submarine full of soldiers shot by a torpedo? Tragic war heros, that we will remember and honor

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Am I the boss.No I was just offered the job

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Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

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Then lets give this another shot, this time we stop questioning how to make others happy, and if that is what makes us happy, then we ask: What else.

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Q. Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A. Because he slipped on his moms three day old tampon.

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Dear mom, I'm wearing skinny jeans. If I can't get them off, Neither can the rapist.

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Why is the black guy unable to support his family? He's 3 years old.

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The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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whats bright and yellow? the sun.

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What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

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What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

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What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? A disgusting halfbreed which prays daily for its own euthenasia...

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Well, a test is a well thought-out series of questions, usually used in schools to determine a students final grade.

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What do you call a man with no legs? Disabled.

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Three Jews walk into a bar... I lied, it was a gas chamber.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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I dont no the difference between their and there

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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