Q) what do girls like long , soft (can go hard) and has white stuff come out A) Twinkies but if left out of its plastic wrapping for a long period of time it will go hard

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How do you feed a mockingbird? Give it some food.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What happened when the lawyer pissed all over the judge? He was thrown off the case, causing him to go home, rape his wife, and put a bullet into his child's head.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What is large white and if it fell out of a tree would kill you? A refridgerator

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the house burn down? Because I set it on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's the difference between a plum and a bunny? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Throw a brick at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

GAME OVER!!!!!! OF COURSE!!!!!! I BEHELD AS SATAN FELL FROM THE SKY..: LIKE LIGHTNIIIIIIIIIIIING! Street Fighter 2: The (antijoke) Movie. Moral: Raul Julia, you are the man, rest in peace dude you made that movie a masterpiece, do not give this a thumbs up for me, but for the most brilliant performance he ever gave.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one animal there and it was a dog. It was a shitzoo

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did Susie fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why is it incorrect that the universe will end in 2012? Because profound idiocy doesn't always occur.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q: What did the student say to the teacher? A: The answer is four.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

a dyslexic man came on this website thinking it was made by his aunt Tina keoj he was sadly mistaken. it was just a bunch of jokes about dyslexic men going into bars

thumb_up thumb_down +31

nba live 13

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you call a group of jews hiding in an attic? Well, this sounds very similar to the events during World War II in which Anne Frank and various jewish refugees hid from the Nazis.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

The WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A. Hey.. B. Hi

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A child rides by his mother on his bicycle and says "Look Mom, no hands!" The child doesn't come back, and night falls but he has yet to come home. His mother calls the police and a search begins 2 days later. He is never found is presumed dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A man walks into a bar. He asked the bartender if he accepts $100 bills. The bartender says "no".

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are red, violets are blue ive got a gun so get in the van!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the black man wear a coat, shirt, pants, and underwear on a rainy day? Because he didn't want to be naked.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

"Want to hear a joke? Tough."

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops