Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a bin lorry

A:Knock Knock, B:Who's There? A:Orange, B:Orange Who? A:Orange Banana.

wanna hear a joke: women's rights

How do you stop 5 black guys from raping a girl? You call the proper authorities. Don't try to be a hero.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

How do you get a black man to use a condom? You explain to him all the benefits of safe sex.

Why did the man drink his own piss? Because he was Bear Grylls

Teacher: What's 2x2 John? John: (ignores teacher) Teacher: John! John: huh? Teacher: go on John: uh? 24?

A duck flies to someone's backyard pool. Moments later it takes a dump , then suddenly flies away.

what does adolf hitler and jewish people have in common? they *** and **** but **** will always **** that hard but **** is ****** up rather ******, and they don't eat bacon

so one day i was getting my daughter artemisia ready for school and so i came in her room and got her pants and so i put it on and then i said did you grow during the summer really did you and then she said daddy both of my feet are stuck on one side of the leg

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

Whats the difference between football and basketball? Absolutely everything By darragh Hamilton

What do you call a unicorn without a horn? A horse.

Why Is Jarrod spencer gay Coz he is

What do u get when u mix a dinosaur and a lesbian? A-lick-alot-a-puss

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard -you throw them.

Me: Whats your favorite color? Joe: Blue! Me: Wrong

What's the difference between a wife and a chef? A chef has the choice to leave the kitchen.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay man's house. Knock knock... Who's there? The Chicken

What's a slang term for a really, really fat person? Overweight.

Q: What's small and can't read? A: A candybar

no pen = no studying no studying = bad grades bad grades = no job no job = no money no money = no food no food = death DON'T LOSE YOUR PEN

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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