Roses are Red Violets are Blue Im Really Stoned And you have met with a terrible fate haven't you?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the other birds had taken hostage the chickens family.

How do you blindfold and Asian? By using a sturdy bandanna, cloth, any other object to avert ones view.

A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

100% of smokers die 100% of people die I am tied to a tree

How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

Q: I have 2 dogs. Why? A: I like dogs

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

What do you call a black man who is poor, homeless, and HIV positive? Unlucky.

knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

Q:What did the robot say to the boy? A:Nothing the robot malfunctioned and started choking the boy, despite the towns best efforts they could not release the death grip on the boys throat, after the robot was done choking the boy it exploded killing 99% of the population in a 5 mile radius.

trumpy trumpy trump

Miranda Lorenz is a WHORE!!! She has slept with three guys while in a relationship!! then when he broke up with her for cheating on him, she keyed his car!! Psycho Bitch!!!

What kind of blue is not heavy? Light blue.

What is the answer to the universe? I would tell you but you would get board.

I hate when Harry Potter showers in my Potatoes....

Two generals went for a trip, it went very well in general.

Why does Logan Cole beat off to Yo Gabba Gabba! ? Because Tim Tebow.

What do you call a man who has committed more than 10 crimes? Whatever his name happens to be.

Q: "What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?" A: Dr. Dre

So there's A blonde, a brunette and a redhead at a lake. they all swim across and have a picnic at the other end.

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock kock ding dong ding di-ding dong zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh weeeeeeeeeewooooooooooooooooo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz hey yo wake up zzz-oh-huh-what-whos there i've been yelling for like five minutes oh sorry jim will you let me in already all right

Why did hitler need glasses? Because he could Nazi.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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