Why did the zombie go to school? Zombies do not exist and certainly do not go to school.

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yo mama is so fat she went to the doctor and the doctor told her she had diabetes

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That moment when you touch your balls then sniff your fingers and realize it smells good.

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The Game.

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What's Black white and red all over? Half a penguin

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Whats the diffrence between a boy scout and a Jew? The boy scout comes back from camp.

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How many cows say moo? All of them

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What the difference between water and water? Nothing, they're both water.

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How do you kill a Chinese man? There are many ways, all of which are horrible

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I Like my women like i like my wine, 6 years old and locked in the cellar

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Why did the man get hit by a van? He was blind, and his guide dog was an idiot.

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asian, do math

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CHIIIICKKIIIIIIIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What does Patrick say? IM PATRICK!!! IM PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK!!!!! PATRICK!!!!!

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That guy is so lame, he needs a wheelchair to go places.

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What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? No one knows he hasn't been able to open his presents yet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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Friends are like penguins because when you throw a polar bear at them they die

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A black man boards a plane. He enjoys the rest of the flight in first class.

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24

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How many dull people does it take to replace a lightbulb? One.

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Why do dogs lick their balls? Why? Because they can.

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops