How many aborigines does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They have no idea what electricity is.

Why was the little girl screaming? She was on fire. ~G TY

Why did the Chinese man cross the road? To get to the Chinese restaurant.

Why did the little boy and the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because they were dead.

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Why did the little girl cry when the x-ray showed her mom had a tumor? It was benign.

Q: What do you call a fly with no wings. A: Dying.

Yo Mumma so dumb she has to climb over a glass wall to see whats on the other side.... Yo Mumma's so fat when she walked past the tv she made me miss 5 series... Yo Mumma's so fat when god said let there be light she had to move out of the road. That's nearly all that I have, but if u have one leave it in the comment

What did the latino say when he was struck over the head with a shovel? "ouch"

What did Steegers say when he lost his TARDIS? "The niggers stole it again!"

On a scale of Voldemort to Nigel Thornberry, how large is your nose?

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

what is light brown and looks like sand? sand

Why didn't the blonde have friends? She couldn't find them at the store.

what do you call a dead baby in a blender? -taken care of. by: Calee^_^•

How full could a skeleton's stomach possibly be? Replete with perceptible emptiness.

Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Evolutionarily destined to be eaten by a predator such as a wolf or coyote, barring haing a defense mechanism that allows it to fend off such attacks.

Your computer runs so slow that I had to run a virus scan.

Q: What was so funny about the death of Michael Jackson? A: There wasn't anything funny. He was one of the best pop stars ever and many people loved him.

Why did they name the cat Salty? I have no idea, ask his owner

How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

A man walks into a bar and utters profanity because he's hit his head on a protruding metal object that cannot move out of the way and has therefore made him look stupid because he neglected to walk around it.

The term "serial killer" is a bit strong...i prefer "ghost manufacturer"

Why was the sea green? because a whale took a piss

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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