why did the clown go to the hospital? i hit him in the leg with an axe.

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i'm on the sea food diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

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I took a dump in a well don't ask me i'll never tell i look to u as it fell and now its in the well Hey,i just took a dump and it smells like crazy so here's my number so call the plumber Call the plumber

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What did the blind man say to the librarian? Hello, I am looking for books that are published in braille.

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Why didn't the lactose intolerant man get a drink at the bar? He was the designated driver.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frost bite.

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Why was the fat person sad? Because he was fat.

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Your mom is SO ugly, I entered her in an ugly contest, and she came in fourth place!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a knife Take off your clothes

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stapled to the chickens back.

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas ? Because sadly his father is an alcoholic and cant support him nor his family.

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A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a potocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "Hey, we don't serve their kind here! Your droids will have to wait outside." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Why don't you wait out by the speeder, we don't want any trouble." The protocol droid replies, "I heartily agree, sir."

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What happened to Emma? I raped her!

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buttcrack thumbs up

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What did the blind man get for Christmas? Poison.

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Why did Michael Jackson go to McDonald's? Because he was hungry.

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roses are red violets are blue i have alzheimers roses are red

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What is blue and smells like red paint, Blue Paint

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Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

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What's awkward? Your phone going off at a funeral What's more awkward than that? Your ringtone is Highway to Hell

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it lacks the cognitive reasoning ability necessary to determine that walking into oncoming traffic will surely result in death

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Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? Ones fun to jump on, the others just a trampoline.

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Did you hear the story about the divorcee who was concerned about ecology? Her husband had been hitting her. Good for her to get away from that kind of abuse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops