The same girl who got cancer for christmas had a birthday soon after, as a present She got kimo...but it failed

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Why did the blonde put lysol in the soup? to kill her husband

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Q: What do you do when you find a black man bleeding from a bullet wound on your front porch? A: Call an ambulance! He may only have minutes to live before he bleeds to death! Hurry!

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

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whats long and hard on a black man? his femur.

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two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? One is alive meanwhile the other is an object full of solid waste.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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I used to walk in front of archers, but then I took an arrow to the knee.

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A fish finds that his fishbowl is on fire. He escapes the bowl only to realize he is equally screwed.

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What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

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Why does a trash can smell bad? Because there's trash in it.

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

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Why did the mom go to jail? She committed infanticide. lol.

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What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

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Yo mom's so fat, she's overweight !

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What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa is a jolly Christmas figure that delivers presents to children and Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the the wheels.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Most things, as the Holocaust was a terrible tragedy.

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Women's Sports

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Why could the red-haired boy sing higher notes than the blonde-haired boy? He was castrated at birth.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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The ability to beleive it's butter. Oh shit, wrong site

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Guess What? What? Get in the van.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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