Q: Little black thing with a little red thing on it. What is it?! A: Ant with a broken nose...

thumb_up thumb_down +24

William Wright. 8 perry street Answer-Gay

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A blind guy was reading the newspaper, it said flying cars. I bet he did'nt see that coming!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why did the girl like d1ck? because d1ck was a nice boy

thumb_up thumb_down +22

If I could change one thing about the alphabet, knd stte bporw xzuor flllle !

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, the Krusty Krab is a fictional place, and therefore does not exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I'm your stalker, welcome to my deserted warehouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Ding dong... Knocking hurts.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red, Violets aren't blue, They're fucking violet, And I hate you.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: What's the best way to get a woman to stalk talking? A: Ask them nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: How many light bulbs does it take to change a blonde? A: One, if she tries to swallow it.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

roses are red violets are blue i dont give a damn how bout you

thumb_up thumb_down +20

why are they called the melbourne storms? Because you turn 360 degrees and walk away

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Your mom is so old so will die soon.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

An Octopus walks into a bar and sees that there are multiple people with instruments. The man with the Guitar says "I bet you cant play the Guitar better than Led Zeplin?" So the Octopus plays and he is better than Led Zeplin. Then the man with the Piano says "I bet you can't play the piano better than Elton John?" So the Octopus Plays it better than Elton John. The Last man from Scotland says " i bet you can't plat the bagpipes better than me?" So... The Octopus is playing around with the Bagpipes and they say to him "Hurry Up!" and the Octopus says "Shut up, I'm trying to have sex with it but first I need to get it's pajamas off" (Bagpipes have 8 long things you blow into and they have a pattern that looks like a pajama pattern) hahaha

thumb_up thumb_down +20

where would you hide 100 dead jews in a car the ashtray because they were all cremated

thumb_up thumb_down +18

That awkward when you adimaticlly read "moment in your head because you have seen too many of these awkward moment jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

when geese fly in a V patteren why is on side longer than the other? not as many geese on that side

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is an old ginger lady's favorite type of bread? Whole wheat.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

how did helen keller break her arm? reading at 100 miles per hour

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's the difference between George Washington and Wiz Khalifa? George Washington died many years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. "Yes" the man replies, because he is aware that the bartender wasn't actually asking if the day way long, but rather if the day was hard.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops