whats worse than a paper cut? 2012

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had escaped from a KFC slaughterhouse, and proceeded forward to avoid getting caught. However, the chicken did not consider the childhood lectures off his parents about crossing the road safely, and got ran over by a black Golf GTI, and died instantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Tommy has no arms and legs. What did he get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +28

How are Steve Jobs and The iPhone the same? They got progressively thinner over time.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

7

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Chuck Norris died.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the blond do so horribly on the SAT's? She was pulled outside halfway through her testing session by the school janitor who molested and murdered her in the bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Two penguins were taking a bath. One said "pass the soap." The second penguin replied, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +26

THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Your mom is so fat that she is fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why was the black man a victim of racial prejudice? because he was black

thumb_up thumb_down +26

stop it ryan vallee

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Haikus are useful Actually they are not.... ....I am so sorry

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My van is coming, I'm gonna get you!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why do black people sit so far back in their seats? Because they're used to sitting in the back of the bus

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did Susie fall off her swing? She had no arms Nock nock Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How did the chicken get to the other side? He didnt, he got ran over.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

thumb_up thumb_down +24

how do you wake lady gaga up? you punch-her-face

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock Knock Who's there? Gregory Pelnick

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's worse than this joke? Taking a dump on an airplane as it crashes in to the World Trade Center.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops