What color was the fence before it was painted green? Not green.

Q:What did the hillbilly say when he lost his tractor? A: Where is my tractor

what is black and white and red all over.....a nun being murdered

A blind man walks into a bar with a guide dog in one hand and his girlfriend in the other. The bartender says "Nice dog." The blind man says "Thanks."

What is green and red all over? The Hulk's Penis in a blender

What is next?

How do you make a blonde scream? Set her on fire.

Knock knock! Who's there? Elton. Elton who? Elton John

I had a joke about a tie, but it wasn't funny.

Why did the dog bark at the tall white man? Because the tall white man was in the process of attempting to rob the house in which said dog was situated. The dog was merely defending its patch.

A Frenchman stays and fights

What did the Anti-Semitic man say to the Jewish man beside him? Hello.

tänk om jag inte vill läga upp en ny

A priest and a rabbi walk into a strip club. They then realised that they are religious leaders and set an example for their respective religious communities and shouldn't be in a strip club and leave.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan? Their last names.

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

There's two men on a subway. One says "Hey, that's my sandwich.".

What's the sound of victory? The sound of a knife cutting into a baby.

There once was a man in Peru, Who dreamt he was eating his shoe. He was promptly taken to the hospital but died from infection.

this website is the funniest thing i've ever seen, besides everything i've seen that's funnier than it

Get your coat, I've got a knife.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Marijuana

What happened to Emma? I raped her!

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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