What do you call a homeless person with a dog? An animal lover.

What did the baby say to the banana? -- "mama!"

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

What's Donald Trump's favorite color?

How do you stop a pedophile from following you? Throw a fridge at him

Yo mama is... a very nice person, and her cooking is exquisite.

Your so stupid, that your stupid.

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road To Get To The Other Side

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. I didn't ask him.

a guy gets knocked out and wakes up in a alley all bloody and a knife next to him!!!

mat: whats 2+2? emma: how long we lasted

Why did the fox cross the road Because it didn't anticipate getting mashed by the passing lorry

how do you take a shit in public? pull down your pants and push in public

Q. What do you call a black pilot A. A pilot

How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You sneak behind it and hit a shovel across its head.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had alopecia.

What happened to the Jew when he heard about the concentration camps being erected all over Germany? Nothing immediately. Then he and his family went into hiding where they were later discovered, taken to concentration camps and died along with millions of other Jews.

What sounds really bad? An accordion.

Q: What is worse than The Apocalypse? A: Darkseid, Thanathos, Red Hulk, Onslaught, come on The Apocalypse cant even beat the X-men! Moral: "I AM THE APOCALYPSE, YOU ARE NOT FIT TO SURVIVE!"

What's are the screams and terror when midnight hits? Vannlia Ice's face.

What do we want? Chips!! When do we want them? Chips

Person One: Three bears are eating tacos, seventeen bears are making margaritas, how many bears are going to the supermarket to get overly prices expired two percent milk? Person Two: ...Who gives a shit!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!!!? Person One: No! That is incorrect!..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................its 16

Why wasn't the turkey hungry on thanksgiving? Because it was dead!

what did the white man say to the black man with the gun? Nothing he was dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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