Q: Whats better than getting raped by a dog? A: Getting raped by a cat.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was thrown out of the way

Why did the man not make any change at his job? Because he is Barack Obama.

What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt will thank you.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all stranded on a desert island for a few weeks. They get to know each other really well.

why did model 602734 have tests? he didn't

Why did the asian die? he was driving

test

scenario: 12 men in bikinis throwing snowballs at each other in Africa. Question: Who ate all the world's giant pears? Answer: It was an allergy to noses!!

Where did little Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere

Q. How is a monkey like a tricycle? A. They both have handlebars... except for the monkey.

Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? You have HIV.

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

A Psychologist said that I am a pessimist... Figures.

Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

A Jew walks into a bar. He sits down for about half an hour, enjoys some drinks and calls a taxi to take him home.

why are niggers afraid of the dark ? because they think that darkness is the only black thing there

how many gay men can you fit on a barstool 1

A blond, a brunette, and redhead are trapped on an island. They all try to swim across shark infested waters to the mainland. While they're swimming, the blond turns to the redhead and says, "This water is mildly cold." The redhead replies "Yeah."

P1 : Yo mamma's so fat... P2: My moms dead

How many penguins does it take to cover a dog house? Purple, because the Ice cream has no bones.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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