Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she has no arms Why can't she get back up? Because she has no legs Why won't anyone help her up? Because she's a woman.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

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Why do policemen wear belts? To hold up their pants.

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Why did the boy cross the road Because he needed to get to the bus stop

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What's big, white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

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Watch this summer, as General Jack Ryu, attempts to fight his way across the jungle only known as "The streets" as he seeks to save Mary.Bison from the evil clutches of Master Jamie Ken in this epic written trailer! Jack Ryu: So we are brothers? Jamie Ken: No, I am your failed clone! I spontaneously begin burning from me feet and hands! WHHHHHHYYYY WAS I NOT THE CHOOOOOSEN ONE!!!!!! Mary B: Ryu... He is the fifth! THE FIFTH HAS ARRIVED! Jim "Dan" Daniels: Yes certainly, it is well within my scientific genius to create the fifth, yet my former associate Bob Sagat lost an eye in an explosion... CAN JACK RYU SAVE THE WORLD FROM THE MOST DEVASTATING BOMB IN THE UNIVERSE: THE AKUMA BEFORE JAMIE KEN UNLEASHES IT? CAN JACK RYU... FIGHT TROUGH THE STREETS... AND LIVE UP TO THE FIFTH AND SAVE MARY BISON? ALL DEPENDS IF HE CAN CONTROL HIS INNER CHUN LI! STREET FIGHTER V: rEVOLUTION

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Two women were sitting quietly.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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Q: Why did the man have no legs? A: He lost them when his humvee hit a roadside bomb during his last tour in Iraq.

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What did the wise old widow across the street get for Hanukkah? Cardiac Arrest.

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What's worse than finding your dad's wedding ring while fingering your sister ? 3 bee stings.

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What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

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A: ask me if I'm a truck. B: why? A: just ask me. B: are you a truck? A: no.

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Why are "Polish" and "polish" spelled the same? The word is a homophone.

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What did the Engineer say to the English major? Hey we went to the same school and got different degrees! Cool!

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What's dead? Your mum.

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Whats worse than HIV? AIDS

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Q: What's white, sticky, and is swallowed by most women? A: Ice Cream

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A squirrel got killed by getting hit by a truck haha its funny cuz the squirrel died

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Do you want to hear the best joke ever? Me too!

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How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

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Why did the little girl fall down She was shot in the leg

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Why does Lady GaGa have no hair down there? It's physically impossible to grow hair on your toenails.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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