how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

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What did the scientist say to the postman? So your a postman?

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Knock Knock Come in, the door's open.

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Chuck Norris drove to McDonalds and ordered a Whopper. Much to his dismay, McDonalds does not make Whoppers, because that is the signature fast-food burger of McDonald's biggest competitor, Burger King.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gregory Pelnick

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why is 4 afraid of 5? Because Monkey's eat purple pineapples

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A Rabbi, A Priest and an Imam walk into a bar. The Imam doesn't order a drink because it is strictly against his religious beliefs.

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q. what did the fat guy get from burger king a. heart disease

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First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

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only downer about having sex in the dark is........................ when u look out window and guy u thought u were sleeping with waving and laugh

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

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A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

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Where did the 5 gay guys go? One direction

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What do you call a disabled Jew? His name

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A man falls into a lake but no one is around to help him, luckily the man can swim so he got out of the lake and went home feeling embarrassed

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whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

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Hey, want to hear a joke? Women's Rights

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What's worse than finding mold on your cheese? Getting Raped

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 murdered 4 and 5 then raped 10

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? They threw a fridge at her.

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What do you call a group of black gentle men running down a hill A group of black gentle men running down a hill

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What's cold and icy? Ice

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A guy walks into a bar. He puts an icepack on his head so it doesn't swell, and decides to go out for a drink. He walks into a bar and thinks to himself, "that's twice today, maybe I should just go home."

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Going for the Dislike record woot I farted!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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