Hitler had the right ideas, wne tupon it the wrong way.

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How do you stop a black person from drowning? You don't.

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What is worse than the Holocost? Keeping the Jews alive.

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jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water. jack fell down and broke his crown, and is now in intensive care.

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Once upon a time, there was a pair of headphones. It loved the sound of music.

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only in america: does pizza arrive at your house faster than an ambulence do banks leave their doors open and chain their pens to the desks people put their usless junk in the garage and thier expensive cars in the driveway

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Why was the blonde staring at the orange juice carton? She was trying to read the nutrition label and had forgotten her reading glasses.

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Two black guys and a Latino were walking down the street. One of the black guys says to the Latino, "You have some lint on your suit." The Latino brushes it off and says, "Thank you. I have an important meeting with the board of trustees this afternoon, and it would have been embarrassing if I had lint on my suit."

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whats the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? i don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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What did Lebron James say to Brad Pitt? "What's up, Brad?"

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Q:What do they call her? A: They call her love,

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What would Billy Mays do if he were alive today? Yell.

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what did the kid do after the rabbit told him trix are for kids? he beat him with a stick then ate some sushi.

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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how do you teach a baby to walk? cut of its hands.

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How do you make lady gaga angry? punch her in the face and throw her off a cliff

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Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit on the back of the bus? All the other seats were taken....

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A man calls customer service. A man in India helps him with his problem.

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123

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German sausage is the wurst

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Q: what did the deaf boy get for christmas? A: an ipod shuffle

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was disturbed by two black men raping a young girl with leukemia.

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Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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