I heard you let the cat out of the bag. It died.

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If I have 10 apples and you have 45 oranges how many plates can we fit on the roof? Purple because monkeys don’t fly

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The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

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Yo mama is so fat that you are constantly ridiculed by the local kids and constantly hope that the obesity isn't hereditary.

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waste down and had no way of feeling

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What do you call a bicycle that likes threesomes. A tricycle

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You wanna hear a joke about my penis Nevermind, it would be inappropriate of me to say such a thing.

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What was the color blind boy's favorite color? I don't know? neither did he

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whats worse then finding out your girlfriend cheated on you.. -9/11

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How do Ethiopians celebrate Christmas? They don't there to worried about dying from Aids and starvation

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dog

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What has 7 mouths 3 eyes and 5 noses Something very ugly

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What do you call a man who gets off the train at Willoughby? Dead

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What is brown and sticky? The substance used to line your stomach when getting your stomach pumped.

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Knock knock. Hello dear. Come in.

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Early yesterday around 10:23am a local women by the name of Bethany Francis Polluch died from a injury to the head. At the scene investigators discovered a tree fell on her causing the trauma. Believe it or not the tree was in the kitchen.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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If you are good at taking quizzes, you are quizzical. What are you if you are good at taking tests? Testical.

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Knock Knock? Who's There? The Gestapo.

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how do you upset a barber? Murder his family

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how do you make a family tan? You burn them in the house.

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Knock knock? Whose there? Who's. Who's who? No you used the wrong form of who's.

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Q: What do cows do on the weekends? A: They go to the Moovies Q:What do pigs do on the weekends? A:Go Bowling

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haiku's are stupid, and do not always make sense, refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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