when do you go to heaven? Never, it doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a cat with no legs and an inverted anus? Nothing, you're to horrified to speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

ps3

thumb_up thumb_down +35

what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Your mom is so ugly that she decided to work as a prostitute and she died a virgin.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Your argument is invalid, but I will allow you your opinion nonetheless.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Romney 2012

thumb_up thumb_down +33

i said why are you disliking me he said its anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Wanna Hear A Joke ? Afgan

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Sea World Japan.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't. Numbers don't have emotion.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the chicken cross the road? As this question does not provide neccesary information, a plausible answer cannot be found.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

69

thumb_up thumb_down +29

when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a black eye.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A Mexican, A Jew and a Irishman walk into a grocery store...The Mexican buys some bread, the Jew buys some bread... and the Irishman buys some bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

no u

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: What did the rectum say to the Anus? A: "Your a waste."

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: what would george washington be doing if he were alive right now? A: screaming in his grave

thumb_up thumb_down +27

I like my coffee like I like my women Without a penis

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops