Why was the woman convicted or arson? She set her house on fire. Why did she set her house on fire? Her husband was beating her.

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Why did the kid get athsma? Genetics.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

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What do you call a black kid on a bike ? Dirt bike

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whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

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A black man, an Asian, a Jew, and an American all jump off a building. Unfortunately, they all died on impact and their families will mourn for years to come.

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Why did the todler fall over? He's an iraqi child and has ben shot inboth legs being readied fro public excution for fighting on the opposing side a.w. j.p.

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What do a baker and gynecologist have in common? They can smell it, but they can't eat it.

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What happened to the kid who slept on a roof? He died

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What did one guy say to the other guy?? Well he just hi but hi backwards is ih and that reminded him of his days in Nahm because that's what his Sargent said and that reminded him of ice-cream because his Sargent smelled like ice-cream and that reminded him of the song that the ice-cream played which reminded him of Disney world which reminded him of a priest raping little boys which mad him laugh because that reminded him of a Jew picking up a penny which reminded him of Osama be shot in the f**k**g face and that reminded him to say how are you to the other guy.

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what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing? Answer - A gay homosexual

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Whose there? A chicken.

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why couldnt sally help timmy pick up his ice cream? she had no arms

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How many beans are in a soup? Who cares i'm starving, Lets Eat!!!

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"This is not a drill!" - guy holding a hammer

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Teen pregnancy

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9 little monkeys jumping on the bed... One fell off and died!

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Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

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Q: Why do so many of these anti jokes contain refrigerators? A: Seriously I don't know why

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what did the joke say to the anti-joke? do you want to fight

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what do you call a dog? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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What would you do if you're eyes just suddently exploded? You would never see again.

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I can Nazi

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Why did Billy fall down? Because his brain was replaced with a piece of toast.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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