Will my son live, doctor? No because you don't have a son and I am not a doctor

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A man walks into a car dealership. The salesman was nice and he bought a Mercedes.

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Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll probably just land back on earth.

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Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

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Women's Rights

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I'm Jewish

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How do you make a clown cry? You kill his family and chop off his legs.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

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Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

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I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

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If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

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Time flies like a banana.

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Your Momma is so ugly, she got plastic surgery.

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What's has 4 wheels But ain't a blue car A red car

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Ask me if I'm a giraffe Are you a giraffe? Yes

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What'd the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Just Dance 2 the video game

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Star Wars

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What did the farmer say when he lost his pig? Wheres my Pig?

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Why can't Jesus eat M&M's? Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands.

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A red house is red. A blue house is blue. What color is the green house? Clear they are made of glass.

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A pregnant woman is about to deliver. Both she and her husband are very excited about their first child being born. Then, it turn out that their baby has a rare deformation and has no limbs at all. They still love him

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? You shouldn't eat Jews, unless your a cannibal for which you should seek psychological help.

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sixty....eight.

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Life is like a box of chocolates, it doesn't last as long for fat people...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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