I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

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Q: who is the worst person to ever post "jokes" on anti-joke.com? A: ryan valee

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How many small children does it take to change a light bulb? None. Children are not old enough to do this by themselves.

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A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

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How do you stop a train? Throw a fridge at it.

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Women's Rights

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You know George Washington? He died.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is black.

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You won't put that in your ass.... No shit.

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Yo moma is so fat. yep.

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Obama is a black man living in a white house. TEEHEE

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How do you make Sasuke cry? Kill his family

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An Oldish (probably 27) man walks into a chuck-e cheese, He then puts on his coustume.

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What do you call a lettuce named Andrew? Andrew.

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What do you sit on, sleep on and brush your teeth with? A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush

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What is brown and sticky? A masturbating Negro.

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why did the boy dress up like a girl? because he has autism.

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What's more annoying than Minion quotes? That the girl in the basement keeps screaming for help.

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OGC - tilt your head

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How can an iPhone play music? It has a built in iPod installed.

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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dad; were is ur head son; its on my neck duh

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What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead black guy in the road? It doesn't matter, I cried after both

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What is Osama Bin Laden's favorite food? I don't know, and to be completely honest I doubt you do either.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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