Q: what do strawberry and a cat have in common? A: they are both red except for the cat

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits.

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- I have cancer. - SUCK IT UP!!!

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what do you call a kid with no arms and legs under a bus an ambulance, he's obviously in pain

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Is this Chick-fil-a? No, this is Joe.

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69

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Goon Bear+Homo= Corey Jacobs True Story

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Do you know what Chuck Norris does for a living? He's an actor, I also heard he's quite good with martial arts.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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A teenage boy tells his family that he is gay. His mother says she had always known, and they accept him for who he is.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He farted

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What's brown, dusty, and full of male? My asshole.

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How did the lifegaurd break his leg? He was hit by a submarine!

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Knock Knock Who is it? Me, I forgot my keys on the way out oh ok...

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What comes after 69? Mouthwash

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shut up

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Wow, thats warming to the core Nero, you are really sweet when you want to, I was having a lot more than second thoughts, I mean I do not mind the thought of sex with you really and I mean that, but losing who I already consider my best friend would just be sad. So uh, sex once huh? I mean, one more feather on the uh, hat thing, is that what this is about to you?

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Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

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Did you see the blind man get hit by a car? Neither did he.

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Why does this dog have herpes? Global Warming.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Boo. Oh hey man, you got the meth?

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Two muffins are in the oven, one looks at the other and says, "it sure is hot in here." The other responds, "AAhHH a TALKING MUFFIN."

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An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

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Humpty Dumpty didn't fall I pushed him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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