I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I drink water!

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Why was the plumber very sad Because i killed his family

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what do you call a black guy in a house? a burglar

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Nickelback.

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How are a plum and a rabbit alike? Theyre both purple except for the rabbit.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "My son was just diagnosed with pancreatic cancer."

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why did the little old lady die? she was mugged then shot in the head 5 times.

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(insert Anti-Joke here)

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A man. That is all.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness. Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary.

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Any idea of his whereabouts Nero? I am the leader, I fund this myself, as you know money is not my problem, its rather loyalty.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer .

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Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

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What did the man who was punched in the throat say to his friend?

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A boat sinks in the ocean, what does the sailor do? Nothing, he wasn't on the boat.

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a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and the cut his head off

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Welcome to AntiJoke.com Jeff. Jeff just got his mind blown.

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Why did the young woman have a sore vagina? Because she just experienced intercourse for the first time and her partner was not as gentle as he should've been, given the situation.

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How do you make an antijoke corny. How? Corn.

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a mexican, an asian and a black are all in a car, who's the driver? their friend bill who offered to take them to the upcoming three days grace concert.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Somebody who wants to come in.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is black.

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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What would we do with out women? Die and then become extinct

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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