A man walks into a bar, he drinks, then leaves the bar.

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

How did the Pollack die? Cardiac arrest.

Your mama's so fat, that during her last physical checkup, her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to lose some weight before any serious medical conditions arose that would adversely affect her health and well being in a chronic fashion.

What do you get when you cross Arsene Wenger with Darth Vader? Arsene Vader

Whats worse then a Republican? 9/11.

What did the doctor tell the boy with no arms or legs? I'm sorry, you have terminal cancer.

What do a large mouth bass and my wife have in common? They are both in the Animal kingdom, both are vertebrates and they share many other traits such as eyes, a notochord, and epaxial/hypaxial musculature.

Q: What can a bench do that a mexican can't? A: Support a family.

Whats black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white? A Nun falling down stairs

gay marriage.

what do you do when you see a 40 ft tall gorilla? WHO CARES, RUN!

Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a Mafia boss so they put him in prison.

that awkward moment when you get in the van and there are no sweets...

3 ducks are sitting in a pond. one with blonde feathers. one with brown feathers, and one with white feathers. A Transvestite Inbred Donkey Man kills them instantly.

anti jokes are like dogs They both rhyme with Maths

Why did the bunny eat his food

Why do horses read books? We are all doomed...

Your as much use as Anne Frank's drum kit.

Baseball

jack shine has boobs

There was a blond girl, a redhead, and a brunette. They all walk into a hotel and are granted equally friendly desk service because hair color is not a reliable indicator of intelligence or economic status.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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