What's your middle name? (Interrupt them) It doesn't matter what your middle name is! What does deduce mean? Fall down the stairs.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Somebody who wants to come in.

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

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Your mother is so fat that unfortunately she can not fit into her picture for her passport and is not allowed to leave the country to go visit her dying mother.

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professor x walks over to wolverine with good news, he falls and dies of a severe concussion

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Your mom is so old, -just kidding. I know she died at a young age.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has psychotic tendencies.

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When does the Trogdor come? In the Niiiiighhhttttt.

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Person 1: Do you like impressions? Person 2: Yes! P1: Why? ... P1: That was Socrates.

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What do you call a kid with no arms annd legs? Names

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What is the longest word in the English language? SMILES: there is a mile between the first and last letters!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the immigrants.

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What did the white guy the black guy and the Asian all have in common Penises

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So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

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There was a deaf guy who heard a mute guy tell someone that a blind guy saw a guy with no legs win the marathon

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what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped covered in semen.

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Nicholas Cage

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What color is my lamp? Brown

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good. The food I placed in the refrigerator a few hours ago will now be cold.

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what do you call a retarded child with a doll in his hand while crying and running up a hill in bell bottom jeans in august at night a block of ice

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to see his mother before she passed away of terminal cancer

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Why was the man named Thomas? Because that was his name

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah Witness.

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What did the frog say Magican? Ribbet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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