A dog walks into a bar. The bartender asks the dog "what will ya have?" The bartender is then recognized as The Dog Whisperer

Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

What do a comb and a guitar have in common? Neither of them can climb trees.

There's a American, Mexican, and a Canadian stranded in the desert. They couldn't find any food, water, and shelter. They were all really hungry and thirsty. Later that day the Mexican dies from a very bad infection on his neck.

A man witnessed a car crash. He was traumatized

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your worst nightmare!! Ohh.... Do come in it's raining outside.

Knock Knock? Whos there? akward neighbor. akward neighbor who?

How do you stop someone from dying of cancer? Shoot them in the head.

Mmmm, donuts

Why did the passenger plane crash? Well, if not mechanical failure or human error, probably because a bomb was detonated onboard.

Kate

If life throws you lemons Catch them

What do you call a racist guy surrounded by a gang of black pepole? Dead.

What's funny about suicide? Nothing, that's horrible.

A man walks into a bar. Ow!

Do you know any good bird jokes? Well this is hawkward...

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

Dead babies.

Doctor, Doctor I keep getting pains in the eye when I drink coffee! It's not the coffee, you have a deadly case of ocular melanoma, a form of cancer that affects the eye. You'll be blind within the next 24 hours.

knock knock. who's there? whoer whoer who? whoer you?

a 12 year old walks into a bar she orders a drink and dies she then walks out of the bar

Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

What do you do when you see a black man? The same thing you do when you see anybody.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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