Q:How do you make an accountant cry ? A: You kill his whole family

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a banana

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What do you call a woman who is good at driving? Danica Patrick

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What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

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whats red and looks like a bucket a red bucket whats blue and looks like a bucket a red bucket in diguise

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did you ever see a butter fly?

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What happened to the man that never got picked up? He died of a brain aneurysm, the ambulance never came.

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You better run like your ass is under fire, because it will be if you don't.

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A blond is stranded on a desert island when she finds a magic lamp. Except it's actually a rock and she is hallucinating due to dehydration and starvation.

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One Big Ass Mistake America

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Punchline.

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Your momma is so fat that she has really high cholesterol but also an undoubtedly warm personality.

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steves legs

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How do you amuse a blonde? ? tell her to go to antijokes.com ( :

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Why did Willy kill the black man? Because not.

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Adam knocks on the door. Eve: who is it? Adam: Don't be silly, just open the f*cking door.

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what do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

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Turtles

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What happens if you're in the middle of counting towels? You finish counting your towels.

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The outside of my house is painted yellow.

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Whats worse than having no mother? Having no mother and father, enabling you to have to support a family at the age of 12, using the allowance that your parents are supposed to give you once a week.

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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

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what do you call a retarded child with a doll in his hand while crying and running up a hill in bell bottom jeans in august at night a block of ice

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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