A man is walking on a beach when he finds a golden lamp. He rubs it and a genie comes out. The genie tells the man he will grant three wishes. The man wastes his wishes on material goods that do not bring him happiness.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This line doesn't rhyme Neither does this one.

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how many jews can you fit in a honda civic 1 in the driver seat, 1 in the passenger seat and 3 in the back properly fixed with safety belts.

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Nock nock. Whose there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow wh. ( mmmmooooo)

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why does everyone hate chris. cause he's a douchebag.

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Whats worse than meeting kim kardashian? everything shes the hottest freakin celeb there is

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Mmmm, donuts

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A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

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Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

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Women rights.

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Q. WHAT IS SPECIAL ABOUT GEORGE BUSH? A. NOTHING

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How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

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Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon A: Ones fun to beat with a sledgehammer, the other ones a watermelon

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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A man walks into a bar He has a water, he is sober

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What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

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What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

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Stop being racist!Be a panda. They are black white and asian!!!!

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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Why was grandma lying on the floor? She just died of lung cancer.

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One time i ate a sandwich it was good

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What is the best thing since sliced bread? Sliced butter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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