Last night I had consensual sex with my long term girlfriend in the missionary position. It lasted approximately 4 minutes before I ejaculated into the durex extra safe condom.

Rose's Are Red Violet's are Blue You Should Be In A Zoo Dont Worry Ill Be There Too But I Wont Be In A Cage With You Ill Be Laughing At You.

What did the dog say when his family's grandmother came back to life from the dead and ate everyone? Nothing. This is a highly improbable situation, and furthermore, dogs cannot speak.

Why are Chinese people only allowed one child? Because their government states so.

Why did the priest renew his...SHIT, A BEAR!!

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

God is religiously proven to be real

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

Why did the man jump off the bridge? He was clinically depressed and wanted to commite suicide

A black succeeds

An attractive naked woman walks into a bar. Everyone is surprised, and all the straight men, gay women and bi-sexual men and women in the bar are sexually aroused.

How do you stop a puppy from barking in the front yard? Put him in the backyard.

Why did the guy read anti jokes? because there funny

The number one killer of daredevil's is the ground.

What did michael J. Fox say when someone asked him to play catch? "sorry, I'm busy".

A girl walks into a bar she is then drugged, raped and left in a back alley. To this day she still has psychological issues that are directly related to this event

Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

American healthcare.

What do you call a group of asians? China.

Woman : Child,what time is it? Child : I'm not a kid, I Broccoli.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a finger And the middle ones for you

gesss what happen u promis not to tell anyone ok this is what happen !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOTHING

What is the longest word in the English language? SMILES: there is a mile between the first and last letters!"

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot. What are you, racist?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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