.Ttwo guys walked into a bar. The third one ducked.

Why did the teacher give the little boy a golden star? He was a Jew and it was in Germany during the 1940's

How do you confuse a blonde?? Throw her in a circle room and tell her to find all the corners If she comes out and says I found the corners.. then your screwed

Q What did the Whale say to the Giraffe? A Why are you in the ocean?

what just happened when chuck norris falling from the sky..? Starts making a wish

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

Why are all teachers stupid? They´re not. Why would you say that?

Why do people make jokes about cancer? Oviously to get thier ass kicked!!! -BY:KOLBY HOOKS

why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

Well, I'm naked so I'm going to go.

A man offered a little boy a ride home. He drove the boy home where his father preceeded to beat him senseless.

Me: Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? You: No. Me: Neither have they.

knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

There's a white guy and a black guy, on a bridge. Of corse the idiot white guy jumps off. But the black guy yells, I NEVER LIKED U!!!!! Later that day the police showed up and asked wat happened. The black guy said, U GOT NO EVIDENCE!!! The police say true and walk away. Then go to Dunkin Donuts and get a triple chocolate donnut and coffee. They lived happily ever after. Except for the white guy. :)

Whats black and can run fast? a panther.... racist

What is brown and lives in a toilet? A black homeless man

Whats the Difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A Pile of dead babies is basically useless

Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

There once was an old man. He had worked hard his whole life to make sure his children got everything they needed, and that they were always happy. He had a beautiul life and a great big house with a marvelous view of the ocean. In time his kids moved away, and his wife died. The old man was left all by himself in the great big house, and sometimes the emptiness of the house reminded him of the emptiness of his own heart. He very seldom cried though, and kept all of his emotions inside. One day it all became to much for him and he took his own life in the silence of his great big empty house. I was that ocean.

Lets just say I work for some important people, not the feds that is for sure, ill tell you when we meet, not here. As for my condition, lets just say that I am profusely bleeding noseblood now and that is because I forgot to take my medication, and if I had no medicaions at all, I would have begun bleeding out of me ears end eye sockets, and ironically id die from a lot of other shit before bleeding to death, so thats not even the case. Its nothing common, but I bet people could find out about it pretty fast on wikipedia, and as much as I like throwing shit on random people here, I dont like bothering anyone with my problems, in this case, it came kinda sudden and unexpected, and I dont mind sharing my deepest aspects including this with my best friends, of which one of them you clearly are love.

Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

What's worser than dieing? Living-being tortured while at it too

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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