roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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what did the apple say to the orange, nothing fruits can't talk

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0 1 this is a sad sad world.

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Two baby seals walk into a club.

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What did the toy cowboy say to the man? Nothing, toys can't talk.

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Whats black,white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Why did the black man fall down? A guy pushed him.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

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A family of five sit on a bench, the bench falls the family die.

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What do you call Americans Watching Canadians? Hockey

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This Irishman walked into a pub and then drank hard liquor for the next 3 hours.

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There's my tractor.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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Who is the fattest mexican on the earth? Not Osama because he's dead...and he wasn't mexican..

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Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

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A black guy, a Mexican, an Arab and a white guy walk into a room and embrace cultural diversity.

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took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

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Why do so many people enjoy these jokes. They are funny

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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