What did Queen Victoria say when she saw a zombie? "Quick everybody, run, that is a zombie."

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What did the little boy get on christmas morning? Cancer.

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Come on children, don't dawdle.

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Q. What do you get when you cross a man, a bear and a pig? A. ManBearPig

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Roses are Blue, Europe is Yellow. I suck at poems, Refridgerator

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How do black people get rich? They collect welfare checks.

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Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

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What is big, long, hot, and firm? An erection due to the arousal of a woman's sex appeal.

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why couldn't jonny ride on a swing? he had no arms or legs why didn't jonny have any arms or legs? he's a potato!

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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whos a sick fuck? jake morris

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I got shot in the balls now i'm pregnant?

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What was the strangest part about meeting a girl called Suzie? She had arms.

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Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

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Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

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A man walks into a bar and orders two shots the bartender then picks up his shotgun and gives it to him

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Yo mama so fat, she suffered a heart attack last week and we are all deeply concerned.

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What's the best way to anger a Muslim? Key his car in front of him.

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There once was a man from Dundee, Whose Limericks ended on line three. I don't know why.

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Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

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WTF THINKING: "If you are going trough hell go back to where the path to hell began just get the fuck out of there you stupid dumbass muddaf0cker" "If you feel life is pushing you five steps back for each one you go forward, just turn your fucking back to your goal and you will get there in no time" "Never ever ever ever ever give up" -Fucking inspiring when you just give up after a certain number of "evers" "IT IS BETTER TO REIGN IN HEAVEN THAN TO SERVE IN HEAVEN!" "I forgot the rest" Nero the ONLY moralman (Fuck Neronism and they copying my shit, I am the only psychopath animal theRAPIST in town! (Female animals only, you think I am a pervert or something? Be ashamed you perverted deviant!)

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What's funnier A Ginger or a fat kid A fat ass ginger

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How do you tell when your dog is dead? I don't know. I never had a dog and my parents beat me.

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What's the worst part about aids? Telling your wife and kids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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