Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first one says, "Pass the soap." "No soap, radio," replies the second one. "Oh, you want me to turn on the shower radio?" "Yeah, it's too quiet in here. I could use some tunes." The first polar bear turns on the radio. "Now pass me the soap, please," he says. The second bear passes him the soap, he washes his face and neck, and then they both get out and towel off. The second bear switches off the radio before they leave the bathroom.

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Women don't have penises. Am I the only one who can't get over how WEIRD that is?!?!?

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Why are you a chicken? Because I say cock-a-doodle doo

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because earlier that day, the chicken was taking a shiit, and when he went to wipe, there was no toilet tissue, so he ran upstairs to his parents room, and shot them both with a shotgun, then he ate them while they were still gasping for air, then the neighbors heard the gunshots so they came over to make sure everything was alright, but little did they know that the chicken planned for it and they were electricuted to a crisp by the fence, oh yeah, why did the chicken cross the road? Because the store for chips was across the street

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Smoke weed till i die nigga

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how many dumbasses does it take to make a kushagra

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You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

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A man cooks dinner almost every night even though his wife is the better cook, and the man is in charge of the household. Why? Because the man isnt a sexist douchebag.

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69 :) 3====D:). [{}]:)

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, these two statement are obvious unless you are color blind

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Your momma is so fat that she decided to begin an exercise program and eat healthy and she lost weight.

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why do black people like watermellon? becasue it is a delicious red fruit at a wonderful price

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What's worse than 10 babies stapled to a tree? The Holocaust.

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What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't.

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Girlfriend: OMG! what could be worst than you cheating on me? Holocaust

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Why did an asian lawyer commit suicide? Because his wife left him and he hated his miserable life.

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what did the apple say to the peer... I taste better !!

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Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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1234567890? ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ

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Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

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What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

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So a black man steals a bike Because it was unlocked, and that was just poor planning.

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What do you call a man with no arms? Disabled... some people can be so cruel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops