What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

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John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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Have you seen that ad about starving children in Africa? It was pretty gay

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whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion getting raped by 2 giant scorpions

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

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Once upon a time in a far away kingdom, people lived in it. The End.

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alert("Hello");

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what will you never loose if you play world of warcraft your verginity

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Do Your Homework: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Get An Award At School: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Figure How To Adjust The Zoom On Your Computer: Mum & Dad - WOW HOW DO YOU KNOW SO MUCH, YOU'RE SO CLEVER, WHO TAUGHT YOU THIS?! Typical ...

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Why did Timmy lose the race? He had no legs

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Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the rest of the kids during recess? Tiffany is a pencil.

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What is fat and white? A polar bear with a glandular problem.

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What did the man say to the ugly woman? Your face makes my penis soft.

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What's the difference between girl scouts and boy scouts? Girl scouts are usually females and boy scouts are usually males.

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An epileptic man attends a rave.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter, he won't come.

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what did blonde say to the square? ur a square which is comprised of four equal sides and always have four lines of symmetry.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree Because it died

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You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

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How long does it take you to count to 5? 5 seconds.

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

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What's worse than a baby on a pitchfork? Two babies on a pitchfork.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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