There was a boy named Steven, a son of a rich business man. Steven was an interesting child though, as he always kept care to one of his possessions. That possession being a plain, old, brown box. On Steven's fourth birthday his father said he could have anything in the world he wanted, just name it. Steven said he wanted two quarters to put in his box. The father agreed and gave his son two quarters to put in his box. Every year the father would say he could have anything he wished for, and Steven just asked for two quarters. Nothing more. On Steven's 18th birthday he got into a severe car crash. The father stood over the hospital bed where Steven lay. "I can get you the best doctors in the world. They can save you, please let me get you this for your birthday!" The boy shook his head. "All I want is two quarters" Steven replied. The father was distraught. "Son, tell me why you've wanted these two quarters every year you have been alive instead of anything else in the world". The boy complied. "Fine I'll tell you." Then Steven died before he could tell the father. The End.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why is Osama Bin Laden scared of the dark? To be honest, I don't know, and I doubt you do either. Osama Bin Laden has been a fugitive on America's Top Ten Most Wanted list for over 10 years; there is no way that you could possibly know such personal information about him if the United States government can't even locate him and prosecute him for the heinous crimes he committed against the U.S. Don't ever lie to me again.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

what would Michael jakson do if he was alive? scream and hit the top of his coffin

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a 5 year old with no friends? A sandy hook survivor

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

rabbits running in my bathroom!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A man and his wife are sitting on the couch in their house, watching tv. The man says, "Do you smell smoke?" The woman then replies, "No." They then proceed to watch more tv.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Yo mama so fat when she goes to the gym, she makes her trainer skinnier.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Parkinson's dl;ghd;jgfldsj;foshdgoljdlkfnjslpaoijejknjvnoidnmaokepinjndonfvio

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the man say when he saw a tornado coming his way? "Oh my god, that's a tornado. I better get out of its way so I don't get injured.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A Muslim gets off his plane from Saudi Arabia to New York and walks to customs where a TSA agent asks him "what is you business in America?" The Muslim responds "I am here for a vacation". He walks on, and returns home 10 days later.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

So, a Hispanic, Jewish, Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "Aren't you tired of this?"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Roses are black violets are black We are all black?! SHIT IM COLOUR BLIND

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the girl with two broken legs give her parents for Christmas? Medical bills.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

whats funny about anti jokes? nothing hince the name ANTI.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a blue bucket? A blue bucket. What do you call a red bucket? A blue bucket in disguise.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? Quite obviously, still quizzical, being that tests are just longer, harder quizzes.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the camel climb Mount Everest? Actually, he wasn't a camel, he was a very experienced mountain climber. In any case no one really knows why he did it.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops