a man walked into a bar and said ow

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What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 20 trees.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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Whats worse then nailing ten babies to a tree? Nailing one dead baby to ten trees.

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Two Mexicans walk into a police station... they don't come out!

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Womens rights.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a bus? Because she's dead

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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A man walks into a bar. He breaks his neck and his insurance provider hikes up his interest rate.

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Today I exchanged money for Meth. There is no joke here. I'm a drug addict

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why did the boy poop his pants Yhe Holocaust

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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What do you call a goose with no arms? A goose

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A man saw a dinosaur. He probably watched it on the television because dinosaurs have been extingt for a very long time.

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There was a buffalo on a farm. The buffalo was slaughtered and then put and a package and sent to people who like the taste of slaughtered, chemical filled buffalo. In other words, people who like buffalo wings.

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What is the difference between a monkey and a pig? A monkey doesn't snort drugs.

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what was the first thing Barack Obama said to the people of america? ... hi

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cannibal. Cannibal wh... As the man opened the door, he was eaten. And they lived happily ever after. The end.

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What do you call a person falling off a cliff Dead

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Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

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What is a terrible tragedy and wears ice skates? Holocaust; The musical on ice

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A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

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Wana hear something dirty? Mud

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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