two muffins are in an oven and one turns to the other and says,'' hey, it sure is hot in here''. and the other one says," holy crap, its a talking muffin!''

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? A: You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

jhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you can a stinky mexican? Whatevet his name may be. Possibly Jose

thumb_up thumb_down +11

"Whats that boy? Timmy fell down the well??" Bout time

thumb_up thumb_down +11

It's okay, I got the yogurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends what its name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

knock knock who's there? Police oh shit

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than dropping you're ice cream? Getting your face mauled off by a German Shepard.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q) What did the farmer say who'd lost his tractor? A) Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

yo mamma so black, she was left out in subzero temperatures for an extended time period and suffered major frostbite all over her body, causing it to become grotesquely black.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what do you call a muslim flying a plane a pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

thumb_up thumb_down +11

If you're jumping rope, and both the tires are flat, how much frosting would it take cover the staircase? Rocket!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was the white man's girlfriend a whore? Because she engaged in sexual relations with a multitude of other men.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

whats the difference between slade , and wizard? wham

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's red, white and blue? You're mother on her period after she had sex. I don't know where the blue came from.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

If you put two black men in an empty room, what will they do? They will most likely try to figure out why they have been put in such a confusing scenario. Then one of the black men will suggest the possibility that maybe they are being used as a subject of a joke. The other black man agrees then they both hang themselves since they have no other purpose in life.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock Knock!! Who's there? The Bailiffs, now get out.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes to step on trampolines.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops