A skeleton walks into a bar, asks for a mug of beer and a washcloth.

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a blond readhead and a brunnett were driving to Miami, they saw a sign for next exit Miami, turned off the exit went to the beach did some shopping and all had a great time together.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the squirrel.

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snowglobe

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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Jews

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What did the smurf say to the other smurf? Smurf

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whats the hardest part about eating a vegitable getting your mouth around the wheelchair.

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How do you make time fly? You can't, time is the duration of events and therefore cannot "fly".

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Once upon a time, in a magical kingdom, there were too many similar jokes on anti-joke.com. One man thought he could be funny by writing a joke that referenced this, and be even funnier by referencing what he was referencing. Then he referenced that, then that, and so on until the layers of meta caused his brain to explode. Some of it landed in your mother's vagina.

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What did the fan of Justin Beiber say? Nothing there are no fans.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The Holocaust.

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Theres a girl you like, and a you are playing football with friends. You see the girl about to get hit by the ball, but you catch it. She says "Your a life-saver" and hugs you "You scream touchdown!!!" to impress her, you spike the ball on the ground and it hits her in the face.

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Why did Henry fall down the stairs? Nobody knows, nobody cares. Poor Henry.

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How do you survive the end of the world? You can't- everyone will die!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape his burning car wreck.

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What is funny about a cod swimming around alone in the ocean? Nothing, over-fishing is a huge problem in the modern day.

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A woman asked a man in an elevator, "Did you fart?" The man honestly replied, "Yes. I didn't expect you to notice because it was the puffy kind."

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your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

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Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? Yeah, he died.

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles

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What happened to the turtle that was on land Dead

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Which does does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops