What is the difference between a pizza and a Black guy? A pizza can serve a family of four.

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Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

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why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

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what's worse than being chased by a turtle? being chased by an angry turtle

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Why did the ANTI-JOKE book cry? -It wasn't funny

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What's the difference between a jew and a bottle of ketchup? People actually like ketchup.

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Q: What did the 6 year old cancer patient say he wanted to be when he was older? A: Doesn't matter he died

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your neighbor. My neighbor who? I told you already, it's pronounced "Wu" I'm very sorry Mr. Wu.

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How do you piss off a moose? You throw popcorn at it

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my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

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what happened to the little girl when she crossed the line she was shot. shes mexican

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Why didn't the oven turn on? Because nothing turned it on.

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Why was Ethan talking to the potato? Because he is stupid.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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What did the man say to the butterfly? To the butterfly? Nothing. He was probably talking to himself.

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Your mother is so large she finds it difficult to fit into regular sized clothing

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Your mum's so fat, she attends regular weight loss facilities to lose weight.

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what do you call a kid with no legs and no arms some one who will nevaer forfill there bucket list cause they cant write it

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What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

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Why was 6 afraid of 7.... because 7 was black

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What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

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What did the white man say to the black man? Hi i'm Steve, it's nice to meet you

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When Geese fly in their 'V' formation, why is one line bigger than the other? There's more geese in that line.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she goes into a clothing store, she often feels self-conscious about having to buy larger than average clothing sizes than most people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops