How many fairies does it take to screw in a light bulb? If you still believe in fairies, there's something wrong with you.

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What is pink and smells like green paint? Pink paint

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

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why didn't the dog run after the ball? he was blind.

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How do you get a blonde to break a nail? Smash her finger with a wrench.

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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womens sports...

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Two cannibals are eating around a fire in the jungle, and one turns to the other and says "Does this taste funny to you?" Oh yeah, and they're eating a clown.

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what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

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A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

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i like pie

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Miami Heat.

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Nero, man, I mean I will hurt you, I am on my way to the hospital, and seriously that pic does not look real, seriously on a hospital? I mean man, I am really sorry! I nearly killed you, how was i supposed to know you do not care about your teeth and take half a bottle of that calcium stuff? My mom? Yeah sure! She laughed at the message you sent her, and if you touch my sis, ill kill you, anyway I am on my way, you better change your mind or I will kick your ass!

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Why didn't the chicken cross tithe road Because it was a motorway

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i think i have a problem with these jokes they aren't finny

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What do you call a muslim with an RPG? Holy Shiite

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What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

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Yo mamma's so stupid, she dropped out of college.

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your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

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why cant the black guy vote? because hes not 18 yet.

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Did you here about the guy who kidnapped Liam Neeson's daughter? Well, he died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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