I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

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How did the little boy break his arm? He was trampleed by elephants.

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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A guy with no legs walks into a bar.

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Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

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What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

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what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

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Know what's worse than being publicly embarrassed in front of your crush? Jeffrey dahmer

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What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

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what do you do if there is a black person in your front yard? tell him to leave...

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I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

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My wife has terminal cancer.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving in a car. They're on their way to the mall, or something.

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What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

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Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

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whats worse then getting robbed by a black man? -getting hit by a bus due to not having the needed currency to get a ride home

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My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

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What is the only thing worse than being a smelly Jew in 1944? Being a Jew in 1944 to hit the showers.

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Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

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Were do you find a dog with no legs ? Were you left him

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Weird, orange is my favorite color.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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